Monday, March 19, 2007

I should be stitching

I don't know what has come over me but recently - and by that I mean the last couple of months - I do not feel like stitching. Instead, I am stuck to the computer. Mostly I read my mail, go arguing on one of two forums I read regularly, or re-discover music videos of my teen age on YouTube. Sometimes I watch scenes from TV-shows that are not aired here in Hungary but are talked of in shows like VH1 specials and so on.

But most often I play World of Warcraft.

There have been many studies dedicated to MMORPGs and how they tend to make one an addict. I certainly became addicted and let's face it, mine was an easy case for the game. I mean, I have a history of mental illnesses, I tend to be very dedicated, and if I want to be honest to myself to the extent of being cruel, my life is pretty much a failure in most things. Why? I lost almost all of my friends I EVER had, I never finished my university studies and don't even have the chance to do so, my first marriage failed and my second one isn't doing too bright, I can't have a full job and cannot find a part-time one, and am practically broke. Really, my baby girl is the only thing I can be proud of.

No wonder I am trying to escape into a fantasy world whenever I can and be a real heroine who kills all the monsters and save the day. At least virtually I am worth something. In WoW I can set myself tasks I can cope with. I can choose challenges and opponents that won't destroy me. I can even best my husband in some things, which does not often happen in real life!

Problem is, I have three RR-s waiting for me and have a model stitching job again. And since I couldn't control myself, I bought me two mini Lanarte kits, and my mom got me two bigger ones, plus I have lots of WIPs waiting for me. Most urgent would be the height chart I started workin on while I was expecting Tamara, and now, less than a month before her 3rd birthday, it is still not even close to being finished.

I guess I should just log out and start stitching.

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